000

[remarkablyblunt]

Hello! I'm Tommy.

Comments

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Tommy? Tommy what?

[remarkablyblunt]

Tommy Beresford! And may I inquire as to your name, sir?

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Beresford? What kind of name is that?

Krycek. Alex Krycek.

[remarkablyblunt]

I suppose it would be my kind of name!

Krycek. That's not Russian, is it?

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Not predominantly, no. What's it matter?

[remarkablyblunt]

Curiosity, really. I'm afraid my experience with Russians has been that they rather enjoy kidnapping me.

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Really? Why? You got something they want?

[remarkablyblunt]

They certainly seemed to think I did.

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Was it the government? Or just a couple of guys who happened to speak Russian?

[remarkablyblunt]

You know, they neglected to mention. You'd be surprised how many kidnappers fail to inform the kidnappee of their identities!

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Why were you kidnapped then? Any clue?

[remarkablyblunt]

Perhaps they simply desired the company of my charming wit and dashing looks.

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm sure it's that exactly.

[remarkablyblunt]

Any particular reason why you might be so interested in my story, Mr. Krycek?

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Just making conversation.

[remarkablyblunt]

Why don't you tell me about yourself, then? Where are you from?

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

The good ol' U-S-of-A. And proud of it, I might add.

You from America too?

[remarkablyblunt]

The colonies? No, certainly not. I'm British!

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

Did you seriously just refer to it as "the colonies"?

That's great. What rock have you been living under?

[remarkablyblunt]

Well, they're no longer colonies, technically speaking. But the sun never sets on the British empire and all that.

That's not to say you all weren't a great help during the War, of course. You chaps really stepped up there, I must say. Eventually.

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

The Gulf War?

[remarkablyblunt]

Gulf? No no, the War. The Great War! Now I've got to ask if you've had your head buried in the sand for the past several years, old chap.

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

"The War"? The only war of any magnitude I can think of hasn't occurred yet. What war are you talking about?

[remarkablyblunt]

Hasn't happened yet? What are you talking about?

If you truly require a history lesson: Archduke Ferdinand was assassinated, resulting in global conflict and the defeat of Germany, Russia, the Ottoman Empire, and Austria-Hungary. The War To End All Wars. Surely you've heard of it - your country was heavily involved towards the end there.

[no-left-arm.livejournal.com]

...you mean the first World War? You're talking about World War I?